Questioning God’s Love by Debra Wallace

by | May 27, 2021 | The Love Offering Guest Blog Series


Allow me to get straight to the point. Ten years into my marriage I discovered my husband was leading a double life. Knowledge of my husband’s same-sex affairs left me hopeless and helpless—just like the paralyzed man by the pool of Bethesda—unable to pick myself up or ask for help. 


Although a Christian for many years, this crisis did a number on my faith. I questioned God‘s love for me. I questioned His whereabouts and why He allowed this to happen to my family. Instead of seeking counseling, I hid in shame and secrecy, isolating myself from everyone I knew who cared and could offer love and support. 


Wallowing in pain, numb and confused, I convinced myself life was over. 


But God…


His plans allowed me to hit rock bottom so I could fully understand His deep love for me. His Holy Spirit never stopped pursuing me—revealing Scriptures were true—not just for others, but for me, too! Jesus showed only He could lift burdens of deception and heartache, providing rest for my weary soul. 



What about you, friend? Where are you finding yourself today? Overwhelmed? Stuck in a slimy pit of despair? 


I’ve got good news. God isn’t finished with you, either! To get out of the sinking sand and back on solid ground, it requires one thing— TRUST. 


Jesus promises He will never leave nor forsake us, yet we are so quick to forget—doubting His words when we find ourselves in crisis. The evil schemer then comes and does his thing, budging in—uninvited, and takes over our birthday party. 


The day we are re-born, receiving new life in Christ, the enemy is angered. When we put our trust in Jesus, we become Satan’s mission to steal, kill, and destroy us. He tries making OUR birthday party all about HIM, instead! 


Not only is this rude enemy not invited to my party, he doesn’t even get a crumb of cake!


In retrospect, it saddens me to see the way I allowed myself to fall into the enemy’s trap of hopelessness and despair, when what I needed was to cling to Jesus, instead. I held myself back from God’s best and couldn’t release control to the One who’s already in control. 


So what happens the next time threatening storm clouds loom? What will our reaction be when we are spiritually attacked? Will we turn to Jesus, instead of turning away? Or will we allow the prowling lion to devour us? 


Make the decision to stay close to the Lord NOW—no matter what trauma comes your way. Be prepared by staying in His word. Pray daily. Put on the full armor of God, to be equipped for attacks from the enemy. Jesus empowers us to be strong and courageous—without giving in to fear. 


Trusting and releasing control allows us to receive joy, hope, and peace, regardless of our circumstances. Ready to watch God move? Let’s do this, together!


Connect with Debra:

FB: debrawallacewrites 

IG: bee_ofgoodcheer



About Debra:

As a woman who discovered a husband’s same-sex betrayal, Debra Wallace validates and comes alongside women who’ve experienced betrayals of their own. She’s an encourager, coach, and battle buddy, helping facilitate wives care groups as someone who has been in a betrayed woman’s shoes and “gets her.” She encourages and points them to Jesus, the ultimate healer, by helping them seek truth through scripture. Understanding what God says about us, being clothed in strength and dignity, she believes we can overcome shame and secrecy to pursue hope, healing, and abundant life only Jesus offers.

Debra works at Be Broken Ministries as a Wives Care Assistant and is an ADOH peer facilitator with a trauma-informed approach. She plans to release her book, When the Glass Slipper Shatters:  Healing from Sexual Betrayal later in 2021.


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I’m Rachael Adams

I’m an author, speaker, and host of The Love Offering Podcast. My mission is to help women find significance and purpose throught Christ.

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