You’re Not Just Hanging On—You’re Being Held

by Rachael Adams | Aug 25, 2026 | The Love Offering Podcast Show Notes

Grief has a way of changing everything. It alters the way we see our families, our futures, ourselves, and even God. It can leave us struggling to find the right words—whether we are grieving personally or trying to love someone who is.

In this tender conversation on The Love Offering Podcast, Cheri Fletcher shares what she has learned since the unexpected loss of her daughter, Annie, in 2023. Through unimaginable sorrow, Cheri has discovered that God does not leave us to “hang in there” by our own strength. He holds us, goes before us, and surrounds us with reminders of His presence.

Looking Back to See How God Went Before Us

After Annie passed away, Deuteronomy 31:8 took on new meaning for Cheri:

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

As Cheri looked back over her life, she began recognizing the ways God had prepared people, places, and circumstances to support her through the loss she could never have anticipated.

This awareness did not diminish her pain. Instead, it reminded her that she was not walking through it alone. The same God who had gone before her was still beside her.

Sometimes we see His care through a friend who sends a Scripture, a neighbor who brings flowers, a pastor who checks on a grieving sibling, or even a bird singing outside the window. These seemingly ordinary acts can become sacred reminders that God is near.

We Aren’t Hanging On—We’re Being Held

Cheri admits she has never particularly liked the phrase “Hang in there.” It can sound as though surviving our hardest seasons depends entirely on our ability to hold on.

But Scripture offers us something better.

Isaiah 41:10 assures us that God will strengthen, help, and uphold us with His righteous right hand. Our hope is not found in how tightly we can cling to Him, but in how securely He is holding us.

Cheri explained:

“I’m not hanging in there. I’m being held in there.”

There may be days when grief leaves us unable to pray, read our Bibles, or even get out of our pajamas. On those days, God’s faithfulness does not depend on ours. He often carries us through the prayers, presence, and practical love of His people.

Your Story May Change, but Your Identity Has Not

Loss can make us wonder who we are now. A role that once shaped our daily lives may suddenly end, leaving us disoriented and uncertain about our purpose.

Cheri reminds us that our roles may change, but our purpose is eternal. We were created to glorify God and share the gifts He has entrusted to us. The roles through which we live out that calling may look different in various seasons, but our identity remains rooted in the One who made us.

“My story might have been rewritten, but my identity has not.”

Grief does not erase the person God created you to be. You are still His workmanship. He is still at work in you, and He can continue using your life in ways you may not yet be ready to see.

Joy and Sorrow Can Exist Together

Cheri describes joy and sorrow as two parallel lanes. After loss, we may find ourselves traveling somewhere along the median—deeply thankful and deeply sad at the same time.

We can laugh with the people we love while still feeling the ache of the person who is missing. Joy does not mean we have forgotten, and sorrow does not mean we lack faith. Both emotions can exist honestly in God’s presence.

Jesus understands sorrow. He draws near to the brokenhearted, receives our questions, and holds every tear. We do not have to hide the depth of our pain from Him.

Loving Someone When You Don’t Know What to Say

Many of us remain silent around grieving people because we are afraid of saying the wrong thing. Yet Cheri shares that having someone acknowledge her loss—even imperfectly—has often been more comforting than having the loss ignored.

We do not need profound words. Sometimes the most loving thing we can say is simply:

“I’m so sorry.”

We can also invite the grieving person to talk about the one they miss. Ask about a favorite memory. Say their loved one’s name. Listen without trying to fix the pain, compare losses, or offer easy explanations.

Love is often expressed through presence rather than perfect language.

Give Yourself Compassion

If you are grieving today, resist the temptation to compare your loss with someone else’s or convince yourself that you should be handling it better. Your pain does not have to meet a particular standard to matter.

Give yourself time and grace. Reach out to trustworthy people. Listen for the Lord’s gentle voice. Allow yourself to rest when you need to rest and take the next small step when you are able.

You are not forgotten. You are not alone. And you are not merely hanging on.

You are being held.

Cheri Fletcher