Have you ever found yourself clinging tightly to control, only to feel even more out of control? I recently had the opportunity to interview a guest who asked a powerful question: “What if I can’t let go?”
It’s a question that resonates with so many of us. We long to live fully and freely, but fear, insecurity, and the weight of comparison hold us back. We think holding on will help—but true strength is found in surrender.
In this episode of The Love Offering podcast, we explore:
💡 What may be keeping you from the life you truly crave
💡 How fear can actually be a catalyst for growth
💡 Ways to silence insecurities and embrace joy
💡 How to overcome comparison, complaining, and excuses
💡 And how to uncover the conqueror within you
This conversation is for the woman who is tired of striving and ready to trust. For the one who is ready to take small, intentional steps toward the life God has designed for her. You don’t have to do it alone—and you don’t have to have it all figured out.
Tune in and take the first step toward letting go and living free.
Listen to the episode now: https://www.lifeaudio.com/the-love-offering/
With hope and surrender,
Rachael Adams
Takeaways
Surrender is a journey that requires daily commitment.
Overcoming fear can propel us into new opportunities.
Insecurity often stems from a focus on self rather than God.
Comparison can hinder our growth and satisfaction.
Trusting God helps us navigate life’s transitions.
Surrendering control is essential for peace of mind.
Building a relationship with God strengthens our faith.
We can find purpose in our struggles and weaknesses.
Cherishing relationships is vital before major life changes.
God’s timing is often different from our expectations.
Chapters
00:00 Introduction to Love and Surrender
02:41 The Journey of Surrender
04:00 Overcoming Fear and Insecurity
10:25 Combatting Comparison and Complaints
13:48 Understanding Surrender in Life Transitions
20:19 Trusting God Through Control
22:06 Discovering the Conqueror Within
24:12 The Ultimate Example of Surrender
25:05 Cherishing Relationships Before Change
26:03 Closing Prayer and Reflections
Transcript (AI Generated)
Rachael Adams (00:01.595)
Welcome to the Love Offering Podcast. I’m your host, Rachel Adams, author of Everyday Prayers for Love, learning to love God, others, and even yourself. Each week we dive into meaningful conversations about how to live out the greatest commandment, loving God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and loving our neighbors as ourselves. Whether through inspiring stories, practical tips, or biblical truths, I hope to encourage you to love boldly, live faithfully, and reflect God’s love in your everyday life. My guest today is Caitlin Menzel. Caitlin is a first time author, podcast host, business owner and regulatory specialist. In her new book, she shares her journey of surrender, letting go of control and trusting God to do immeasurably more in our lives. Through her personal experiences, she encourages us to release fear, overcome insecurity, and step into the life God has made for us. Well, hello, Caitlin, and welcome to the Love Offering Podcast. I’m so happy to have you.
Caitlyn Mentzel (01:15.32)
Hello, thank you for having me. It’s been so fun. I know you were on my podcast, so it’s awesome to jump over here on yours.
Rachael Adams (01:23.623)
Yes, to be on the other side of the mic. And I don’t know, I’m putting you on the spot, but I just heard some really good news about you as we’re hitting record. So do you want to share your great news that you just shared with me?
Caitlyn Mentzel (01:36.43)
Sure, yeah, so I am a expecting mom now, so a little bit new since the last time we chatted, and she’ll be here in seven weeks already, which is crazy.
Rachael Adams (01:47.925)
I’m so excited for you and can’t wait to see pictures. I wish we lived closer and I could even hold the baby in my arms, but, but this is, this is your first child. so, so exciting, such a beautiful experience. And you also have like a book baby. yes, exactly. And so tell us about this, this new book and what it’s inspired you to write it.
Caitlyn Mentzel (02:12.738)
Yeah, so it’s called More Than Conquering, A Season of Surrender. And honestly, it’s been such a cool timing of seeing God work it all out in his timing. In writing a book on surrender, I was struggling with surrendering. So it was very cool to just see how God was working it all out behind the scenes, in like, it took me four years to put this all together and write this book. So just seeing how that all came to fruition when I did publish it and just the timing of it all. Even after publishing, just so much of what I was struggling with came out in the next couple of months after. So just seeing how God kind of like concluded that portion of my story and then kind of has been leading into the next section of motherhood and life in that way. It was just a huge blessing to see like I was struggling with career and my mindset about like money and what timing we would have to do the traveling things and have the family and how it would all like be provided for. And then God like just did it. So it’s like we think it’s going to take so long to get to a certain spot and like God can just do it so much faster than we even can imagine. So that was fun to see.
Rachael Adams (03:35.829)
Absolutely. So we’re going to take a brief break to hear a word from today’s sponsor. And when we come back, we’re going to talk about the fears and insecurities that often hold us back from living in surrender. So Caitlin, you talk about how fear can actually propel us forward instead of holding us back. So can you share how you’ve seen that play out in your own life?
Caitlyn Mentzel (04:00.078)
Yeah, so honestly growing up I was super shy, super insecure and just really hated stepping out of my comfort zone. So I had a fear of public speaking, just kind of putting myself out there in areas where I just didn’t feel confident. And so as I graduated college and got into the working world per se, I just really took a step into self-development, self-improvement, and just by using that fear of public speaking, kind of doing the things and going outside of my comfort zone to either meet a stranger and become a friend out in the marketplace, or to start a podcast, to write a book, to talk to people in front of stages that I never thought I would do. So having that fear of doing all of those things, it kind of pushed me forward to overcome them. And well, sometimes it’s definitely still scary or more shaky than I would like. It’s just really cool to see the transformation that by leaning into who God says I was, I could rely on that strength to continue to build on and work through what I was shy or insecure.
Rachael Adams (05:21.533)
I resonate so much with your experiences because that is me in a nutshell. And it isn’t, it’s so ironic how we are doing the exact things that make us so nervous and that we are so scared to do. But I do feel like over time, God has given me a sense of confidence. It doesn’t, but I think that because I have felt so weak in those areas that then I am so much more reliant and depending on him to strengthen me where I do. Have you found that as well?
Caitlyn Mentzel (05:53.166)
Totally, and I think it’s so cool, like, when I was struggling with that, to kind of like lean into more of like, well, what does it say in the Bible? And like, you see different stories of different people overcoming. I mean, the most obvious one that I can think of is just Moses, and like, he was afraid to talk, and God gave him the strength to go and do what he needed to do for the Israelites. But so many times, it’s cool that God can use our weaknesses so that we can point everyone back to him because like we wouldn’t be able to do it without him.
Rachael Adams (06:24.413)
Yeah. I oftentimes think about like when Paul talks about the thorn in his side, I think my insecurity is kind of like my thorn in my side, but I’m actually strangely grateful for it. because it reminds me of him, in, many ways. And, so let’s talk more about insecurity because I think we’re not the only ones, Caitlin, that are struggling with this. So what are some practical ways that we can fight against it? And maybe even beyond that, like, why does so many of us struggle? Do you think?
Caitlyn Mentzel (06:43.918)
I don’t think so.
Caitlyn Mentzel (06:54.05)
Yeah, I mean, for me personally, I was really struggling because I think I was just so focused on me, myself, and I and what other people were thinking of me, how they perceived me instead of just one, being confident in the choices that I was making, but being confident in who God created me to be because we’re all used for different purposes. And by leaning into reading my Bible more and just getting in a closer relationship with God. I was able to see what he would say about me and kind of drop off what other people’s opinions might be or what I was thinking other people’s opinions would be. So for me, I had to just get a lot better at reading my Bible and leaning into those truths instead of the lies that I was telling myself.
Rachael Adams (07:43.145)
Yeah. And I think you touched on this, you made yourself do the things you were scared to do. I’ve been doing my podcast now for seven years. And I remember from the very first, I mean, I would read verbatim what I was going to say, and I would do it over and over and over again, like record it. Like, mean, I can’t tell you probably 50 or more times because I’m like, I messed up saying that, or I stumbled or I sighed or I said, and just would beat myself up over things. And I still do that on some level, but now 307 conversations later, I realized like everybody struggles and it makes us more human and not robotic. And I have gained a level of like, okay, I can do this. it’s okay. And then I think to your point about God’s Word and just knowing what our identity is and that he’s created us in his image and we’re fearfully and wonderfully made and where his workmanship created to do good works and so knowing that like when we start to criticize and downgrade ourselves We’re really criticizing like what he has made right? Which is yeah, and so I think I think we just have to start somewhere. I guess that’s where I was going with that whole thing. It’s like, it’s going to maybe be awkward and you’re going to be scared to death and sweaty armpits and sweaty hands and heart beating really fast and dry mouth and all the things. But like it gets a little easier. Do you think?
Caitlyn Mentzel (09:14.242)
I think so. It’s just that perspective shift, like you say, to start really realizing that when we criticize ourselves, we’re creating who God created us. And then with that, focusing on what can we do, that little step each day. And just with the repetitions, it does get easier. I know sometimes we might flub up a word, like you say, or the million times that I’ve said in recording or just talking especially like now pregnant, I didn’t want to like succumb to the pregnancy brain thing, but the amount of just like times my brain will go blank or I’ll lose my train of thought, like it’s so real. And so just being okay with that. And I think it just makes you more relatable as a person instead of thinking we’re above or better than anyone.
Rachael Adams (10:02.057)
Yes. Yeah, absolutely. And I think the reason we do that though is because of comparison. We are comparing ourselves to other people that maybe have had more practice than we have or have a different skill set. And so that is one of the things that you emphasize is how comparison complaining and excuses can keep us stuck. So how do we combat these in our daily lives?
Caitlyn Mentzel (10:25.23)
Again, through a lot of surrender, it’s definitely not a perfect process, but in realizing what we’re complaining about a lot or just being really self-aware, I think that helps because if you’re not aware that you’re doing something, you’re not able to fix it. So if you can pinpoint maybe where you’re comparing, where you’re creating excuses or complaints, and then creating the game plan out of it. For my example, I was complaining about where I was working or what I was doing for work. And instead of sitting in that, I needed to realize, well, why am I complaining? And then what am I gonna do about it? Because it’s really easy to complain. So for me, I had to kind of just trust God with that process as well in terms of, well, what am I gonna do for work? I can apply for different jobs and I can do the things to change my situation. But ultimately, like I was trying to trudge ahead too fast and not really allowing God to work in my life and kind of create the plan with him. I was just so focused on getting out of a situation rather than realizing like, well, God put me here for a reason. Like what can I do in the here and now to be thankful for and just really focus on. So that was like kind of how I went about the like the complaining and excuses aspect. Comparison, that’s very hard. That was probably between that and insecurity are probably some of the hardest ones do feel like they go together for me. So there’s a lot of different small things we can do that kind of add up. And a lot of times I had to do those perspective shifts of like you say, we can’t compare what we’re doing on our day one and we’re starting out with something when someone’s already been doing something for five, 10 years, like you can’t compare that at all, how good or bad we are at something. I had to get off of social media for a little bit. I know that’s a big comparison game. just, again, grow my relationship with God and be thankful for the present circumstances that I was in and how I could start stewarding that well in the time that I was given versus always just wishing for something else or wishing my life was the next step ahead, if that makes sense.
Rachael Adams (12:45.651)
Yeah. And I just want to circle back and I meant to touch on this when you’re talking about insecurity, it is a focus on yourself as opposed to God. We talk about so many people that maybe have a prideful posture and could think that’s a focus on me too. And so who are we really trying to glorify and where is our focus? And we need to shift our focus. I think that’s so important and so we’re gonna take another brief break to hear from today’s sponsor and when we return we’re gonna talk about how we can step into the life we truly crave welcome back I am talking with Caitlin. You mentioned different surrendered groups in your book. So can you talk about what that means and how listeners might identify where they are in their surrender journey?
Caitlyn Mentzel (13:48.64)
Yeah, so in compiling my book, I just utilized a lot of resources that I had either read, listened to, and a big one for me was the book, Magic of Thinking Big, and so that’s kind of where I hint at those groups coming from. And so for me, I kind of was a part of all three, those that surrender partially, surrender fully, and then never surrender. And so for me, I just wanted to focus more on what God and I could do together so that we would not really surrender to our circumstances of the negativity, the excuses, the complaining or any of that, and rather focus on moving forward to one, just like create a better mindset for ourselves, but then also just being able to focus on bringing like the ultimate purpose of bringing more people to Christ. And in doing so, then we could avoid those that kind of maybe stumble or fall back on the complacency scale and just kind of sit in their circumstances. I’m a big proponent of doing what we can with God to continue to move forward and not grow in that stale, dormant aspect of our faith.
Rachael Adams (15:08.371)
Yeah, yeah, me too. Something else that you talk about is a struggle with wanting to control. And I have noticed this in myself as a mother, maybe more than anything. Because as a stay at home mom, I could control exactly what they watched every activity, everything they listen to every toy everything they ate and then as they went to kindergarten I remembered like really struggling with that like I don’t know who they’re talking to I don’t know what they’re listening to you know even school lunch like I don’t have control of exactly what they’re eating. And so I’m even now seeing as they’re in middle school and high school, there’s, there’s so much, and my son just got his driver’s permit. So releasing, releasing control of him in the car, me being in the passenger seat and who my children want to end up dating, is it necessarily somebody that I would choose? They’re making their own decisions. And I’m kind of struggling with it a little bit because I, I, while they’re in my home, it’s getting less and less time that they’re actually in my home. And yes, I can give wisdom to them of what I want for them and hope for them and pray for them. But what they choose eventually is up to them and surrendering them to the Lord like Lord I know you love them more than I do and so all that to say this topic has been especially when a message of surrender like I have since the Lord saying you’ve got to surrender them to me and what your hope and then what you’re envisioning for them and your desires for them may not be what they actually want and their desires, nor what God’s desires for them. And so like letting go of that, all that to say, clearly this has been resonating with me and on my heart. So from your perspective, what helped you move from a place of grasping for control to a place of trusting God?
Caitlyn Mentzel (17:06.656)
Yeah, and it’s a daily walk, honestly, because there’s so many things that creep up or cause me to want to grasp for that control and take the steering wheel again. And especially in. I started writing this book during Covid and especially just during that season of uncertainty for a lot of people. I feel like that’s when we all decided to pick up and do something because we wanted like that control back. So as I started writing this book, I realized so many areas that I did want to have that tight grip on, whether it was my career or family, like I mentioned. it was so cool. And so this book came out in September. And then it was so cool seeing all of the things that I was journaling on and struggling with in terms of wanting control kind of come to fruition in terms of my book came out in September, which is just something that I really wanted to accomplish for myself before having kids and we actually found out we were pregnant a couple weeks prior to that. And then I was able to also switch jobs the same month and just the different things that I was praying about as far as like my husband and I’s relationship. We were able to take a trip that we’ve wanted to do for like 10 years in October and just all of these snowballing things. So seeing God work in that way definitely makes it easier to surrender, because you’re like, well, I didn’t do that. So that was all god there. So just having those examples, and I know I was always frustrated with, when you get to the other side, it’s so much better and easier. And I’d be frustrated with people who said that to me. I was like, well, in the moment, what am I supposed to do? And it’s easy to say, trust, surrender. It’ll all work out. When you’re in it, it’s very hard to hear those words. But I think just continuing to remind ourselves that like God has been faithful in the past. So like, why will he not continue to be faithful in the future and in our present circumstances? And so now, especially stepping into motherhood, like you say, like, wow, is that so many more places that we get to surrender control because yeah, it’s a whole new walk for sure. And especially just in being pregnant, it’s so many moments of anxiety or like what is happening? Because sometimes you cannot feel your child move and it’s just a whole faith and surrender of like God, like you’re watching over me and my child right now. Like I don’t have control. Like you are creating this being and I can just be there to steward as best as I can. And so it’s a lot of, all that to say, a lot of prayer for me in terms of Lord, continue to help me surrender because it’s a consistent process.
Rachael Adams (20:04.181)
Yes, an ongoing process. Well, see, you’ve mentioned this a little bit. So you talk about transitioning through different life stages, whether it’s motherhood, career shifts or unexpected changes. So what advice do you have for women navigating these transitions?
Caitlyn Mentzel (20:19.704)
Definitely give yourself a lot of grace and drop comparison as you’re transitioning because everyone is going to do things differently, do things at different timelines. Like you do not have to follow this cookie cutter path that we think for some reason we need to meet at a certain stage or age and just really trust and rely on remembering that God has you in those different parts of your life for a reason. And it doesn’t have to last forever. So just focusing on walking with him instead of running ahead of him is the best that I can give for advice in terms of the transitions because that’s when I always felt that I started taking too much control is when things felt out of whack or something. So just focusing in on prayer and getting in the Bible more, we can just keep our mind focused on the main thing.
Rachael Adams (21:24.093)
Yeah, keep the main thing, the main thing for sure. Your book isn’t just about surrendering, it’s all about conquering. What does it mean to discover the conqueror within and live with bold faith?
Caitlyn Mentzel (22:06.634)
I really like that question. It seems like really big, but for me it was, we hear like, let’s be more than conquerors. Like let’s go do, do. And I’m a big achiever myself. So I always want to do like, well, what’s the next thing? What’s the next thing? And kind of just like slowly pulling it back and realizing like we can be still. We can walk with God. We don’t have to outrun him, outpace him, cause we’re running the race with him. So by surrendering, our life over to Him, we ultimately get to conquer and become children of God and get the ultimate winnings of being able to go to heaven with Him instead of being so earthly focused. We can be more eternally focused in that sense.
Rachael Adams (22:51.475)
Yeah, he really is sovereign. And if we look through all of scripture, Genesis to Revelation, we know he was present with people in whatever circumstance it was, and he works everything for the good of those who love him. And so why do we doubt that he’s going to not do the same thing for us? Right. And so I think by looking at scripture and reading about our forefathers and hearing testimonies like yours, it just helps us so much to increase our faith. If listeners were to take away just one thing for our conversation. What do you hope that it would be?
Caitlyn Mentzel (23:29.154)
I hope that they can realize that God made them for a purpose and that just like you said, He works everything out for our good. So I think in that sense, we can start to compare in a good way in the sense that like we’re not going to get left behind like God’s got us and just really focusing on our relationship with Him.
Rachael Adams (23:50.037)
Yeah, that’s the key. We can’t surrender to somebody that we don’t trust and that we don’t know. The key is to have that intimate personal relationship with him to develop that that trust. I think that is so important. So is there a biblical concept of love that you think applies to this topic today?
Caitlyn Mentzel (24:12.878)
Yeah, so I really focused in on just Jesus being the ultimate surrender and conqueror. He surrendered his life for us that we might gain heaven with him. And so in seeing his human side, in asking the Lord, like, hey, is there any other way in the Garden of Gethsemane? I just really loved that connection that I finally found for myself in that well, Jesus surrendered, so why can’t I surrender? And just following that example, I think, is just the most ultimate form of love that we can get on this side of heaven.
Rachael Adams (24:53.971)
Hmm. No, wholeheartedly agree. That’s so good. And so true. Is there something that you are loving right now?
Caitlyn Mentzel (25:05.528)
What I’m loving the most is just cherishing and soaking in all the time just me and my husband before baby. So we’ve been able to just spend a lot of time together, have a lot of good conversations and just enjoy this next phase in our life.
Rachael Adams (25:21.457)
Yeah, it’s such a sweet phase. I’m so excited for you and I know I want to stay connected with you. I’m sure listeners are going to want to so tell us how we can best do that and purchase a copy of your book.
Caitlyn Mentzel (25:31.756)
Yeah, thanks. So I really appreciate you being able to have me and have this conversation together. But I am on all things social media. So Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, LinkedIn, wherever you are, it’s at Caitlin Menzel. And my book is on Amazon. So if you are a Kindle fan or a hard copy, you can get either option.
Rachael Adams (25:55.677)
Yeah, well, and I will be sure to include all those links in the show notes. But Caitlin, as we start to come to a close, would you pray for us?
Caitlyn Mentzel (26:03.126)
Yes, of course. Lord, work in our hearts and attitude of surrender. When we begin to doubt and fear the plan of our lives, help us surrender to you in your beautiful plan. Let us surrender our ideals and allow you to feel beyond what we think or imagine. When we start to experience feelings of insecurity, please remind us that we are yours. You have created us in your image. Help us surrender to the importance of that. If comparisons begin to creep into our hearts, help us surrender our lives once again over to you, Lord, to trust your timing and that our present is where we are needed to be. As we start to grow complacent, please renew our focus on the bigger picture of leading more people to the eternal life you have won for us. Help us to surrender the complaining and excuses and bring gratitude within us to praise and honor you for all you have done. Lastly, as we go about our days, remind us of the gift of joy you have instilled in our hearts. Work in us to surrender an eternal joy rather than seeking out a fleeting happiness. Shift our focus and restore in us a conqueror for Christ, for the eternal impact. Amen.
Rachael Adams (27:05.748)
Amen. Thank you, Caitlin. I appreciate your time today and sharing your experience and encouraging us to surrender control and step into the life God has for us.
Caitlyn Mentzel (27:15.438)
Thanks so much Rachel for having me.
Rachael Adams (27:17.971)
And thank you everyone for tuning into the Love Offering podcast. I hope today’s conversation encouraged and inspired you to love God, love others, and even love yourself a little bit more. If you enjoyed the episode, please share it with a friend and leave a review. It helps others find the show and spreads the message of love even further. To connect with me, visit me on my website at rachelkadams.com. While you’re there, be sure to download the Love Offering calendar, a free resource filled with simple daily ways to love those around you. You can also take the What Makes You Lovable quiz to discover your unique gifts and qualities that reflect God’s love to the world. Don’t forget to pick up a copy of my new book, Everyday Prayers for Love, Learning to Love God, Others and Even Yourself, and Caitlin’s book, More Than Conquering, A Season of Surrender, both available wherever books are sold. A special thank you to Life Audio for supporting this podcast and making it possible. To find more great podcasts, visit LifeAudio.com. Thanks again for joining us today. Until next time, let’s make our lives an offering of love.
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