Loving Through the Hurt by Beth McCarthy 

by | Apr 21, 2022 | The Love Offering Guest Blog Series

I heard my phone ding. I looked down and saw the text was from my husband. My heart sank into my stomach. My hand shook as I tapped on the message. I listened as a song began to play.


It’s going to take much more than promises this time.


Only God can change our minds.

Maybe you and I were never meant to be complete

Could we just be broken together?

If you can bring your shattered dreams and I’ll bring mine

Could healing still be spoken and save us?

The only way we’ll last forever is broken together.


-Broken Together, Casting Crowns


The previous week I had learned that my husband betrayed me. My whole world came crashing down after one sentence revealed the truth—a truth I so desperately wanted to erase. After this revelation, the future of our marriage was uncertain. I was in a state of numbness and pure heartache, unable to pick myself up off the couch. But one morning, as I sat paralyzed, I heard the Holy Spirit whisper, “Don’t give up.” This prompting gave me the will to fight for my marriage. At that point, I was not sure if my husband felt the same.


So the following week, when I received the song, Broken Together, from my husband, I knew he wasn’t giving up either. The song lyrics spoke volumes. That song started the journey to restoring our marriage. And to work towards restoration, I needed to work on loving my husband even through deep hurt.


Loving someone that just shattered my heart into a million tiny pieces was not something I could do without the power of the Holy Spirit. But, through the Holy Spirit’s leading and the sustaining grace from our loving God, I was able to work towards extending the same grace and compassion to my husband that I had received from God. Continuing to love while still processing my pain was the most challenging part of the journey to restore our marriage. 


Paul talks about this love and compassion in 2 Corinthians 1:3-4:


“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.”


The love and care I received from God allowed me to love even during my heartache. The same grace that held my broken heart allowed me the strength needed to fight for the love that God was working to redeem in our marriage. 



Jesus loves the hard-to-love, and as Christ-followers, Jesus calls us to this same kind of love. He calls us to love those who may have hurt us. He calls us to love during our own pain and to provide compassion to the hurting hearts of others.


Loving others in their brokenness is no easy feat, but we must remember that Jesus knows how hard it is to love when our hearts are broken. Jesus experienced the same heartache and betrayal by those he loved. In our pain, He is there to provide us with the grace needed to love others during our hurt. With Jesus by our side, love is always possible.


About the Author:

Beth McCarthy is a Christian writer passionate about bringing women to know the power of God’s grace. Beth’s marriage is living proof of how God’s redeeming love can bring beauty from ashes. After learning of her husband’s betrayal, Beth relied on God’s strength and grace to hold her up during the devastation and heartbreak. Through that grace, God guided Beth and her husband through a journey of forgiveness and healing that resulted in a restored marriage. Beth writes to encourage others to rely on God’s grace when life’s circumstances leave them struggling to find light in the darkness. Beth lives in St. Louis, Missouri, with her husband and two daughters. You can read more of her work on her website, www.heldwithgrace.com.


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I’m Rachael Adams

I’m an author, speaker, and host of The Love Offering Podcast. My mission is to help women find significance and purpose throught Christ.

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