During a doomed-from-the-start attempt to attain so-called abs of steel, a personal trainer friend observed that the exercises I was using were fine, but my technique was all wrong. He said I needed to “engage my core” when attempting the dreaded crunches, mountain climbers, and dead bugs. It was possible, I was told, to go through the external motions without activating my core while doing so.
I immediately noticed the difference. Engaging my core required deliberate focus on that area, intentional isolation and activation of the muscle group I wanted to develop. I realized why I hadn’t done so before. It was harder work. I didn’t like it. So I stopped.
I never attained an eight-pack, six-pack, or any pack for that matter, but I did learn that there’s a big difference between performing the mechanics of an exercise and engaging the actual muscle.
The process for enacting true, life-giving transformation from Christ follows a similar pattern—one that can be summarized in a simple but fundamental principle: Don’t start with your head. Don’t start with your hands. Start with your heart.
The Bible has repeated the message across generations:
- “Circumcise your hearts” (Deut. 10:16).
- “Rend your heart and not your garments” (Joel 2:13).
- “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” (Jer. 29:13).
- “Search me, God, and know my heart” (Ps. 139:23).
- “First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean” (Matt. 23:26).
- “My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise” (Ps. 51:17).
Putting this into practice is far more rare than it should be. But the means of initiating it is thankfully not complicated. It begins when we intentionally stop to identify our heart and bring it, opened and unguarded, into direct contact with God in a personal, relationally intimate presentation of our truest self. It’s something you can enact at this very moment. Allow me to suggest an exercise to do just that—right here, right now.
Pause where you are. I genuinely encourage you not just to read the next several lines, but to tangibly enact them. Look around the room you’re sitting in and consciously become aware that Christ is actually, literally present in the room with you. He’s near you, close enough to touch. He’s completely and fully aware of everything you’re holding inside your true self. He knows the thoughts you had a half hour ago, the temptations you indulged in this week, the impulses you gave in to this year. He knows the ugly motives you’re hiding, the resentments you’re harboring, the attitudes you’re festering. He knows the lines you cross, the standards you compromise, the fantasies you entertain in the dark. He knows what you say, what you do, what you think. He knows the wounds you carry, the abuses you’ve suffered, the betrayals you’ve endured. He knows your weakness, your shame, your fear, your doubt. The truest you. He knows it all.
Next, consciously incline that truest self—your heart, exactly as it is—toward him. Turn to face him. Show yourself to him. Everything laid bare. No explanations, no excuses. Reveal it all to him and acknowledge that he sees it—all of it. Do so in humility and as an act of unqualified, full surrender. Open your empty hands toward him if it helps. Even if you don’t say anything, simply lay your will and your heart in front of him. Submit your soul to him, to do with it as he sees fit.
Now, with the eyes of your heart, envision his response. See his face as he looks at you with absolute love. Feel his compassion and forgiveness as he moves toward you with intimacy and affection. Watch him gently take your heart, even in its ugliest current state, and hold it as if it’s the most precious possession in the universe. Watch him breathe his Spirit on it. Watch him apply his own purity to it. Watch him hold it out to you again, cleansed and accepted, purified and restored, handing it back to you knowing he has placed his own heart within it.
Then hear his voice as he gently and tenderly says something like this: “Yes, you’re flawed, marred, broken at your very core. Yes, I know everything, and I see completely who and what you are. But you are now wrapped in my love. You’re now drenched in my forgiveness. You’re saturated by my purity. You are granted full pardon and absolution. You belong to me. In this moment, in every moment, you are beloved, cherished, and secure. Your acceptance is complete. Your position is absolute. Your worth is permanent. You are whole.”
This is the epicenter of true transformation. This is where the ability to live from a healthy, open soul begins.
*An excerpt from Open-Hearted People, Soul-Connected Church: How Courageous Authenticity Can Transform Your Relationships, Your Community, and Your Life by Baker Books.
About the Author:
Tom Bennardo is a four-decade veteran of ministry and spiritual formation. His experience spans the spectrum—church planter, lead pastor, mentor and coach, author, and denominational leader. He currently serves as executive director of church leadership and multiplication for the Fellowship of Evangelical Churches, providing training, equipping, and spiritual direction for current and emerging pastors. Tom holds an MDiv from Grace Theological Seminary and a doctorate from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, and is a sought-after speaker, seminar leader, and consultant in church leadership, spiritual formation, and church planting. A New York City native, Tom is an avid sports fan who lives and (mostly) dies with the New York Mets and Jets every season. He and his wife, Marcia, have two daughters. He’s never surfed, but resides in San Clemente, California for the view.
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